It’s the official kick-off to holiday shopping mayhem. Waking at 4am, finding the elusive parking spot, drinking another cup of cold swill, pushing and shoving to get the Samsung’s smart phone embedded in a toaster all to save a measly five extra dollars.
As your stress levels increase your judgment becomes very cloudy, thus allowing you to make very questionable decisions.
So as you wait in line purchasing a six pack of socks for $5.99 (a savings of $1.25), use the following do’s and don’ts to ensure you stay out of jail and black eye free.
Do: set your spending limit at least 24 hours in advance
Don’t: be tempted to sign-up for another store’s credit card offer because they are giving a free Frisbee with every application (doesn’t matter if the Frisbee will make a great stocking stuffer)
Do: take periodic breaks to rest, snack-up and get a cup of coffee
Don’t: strap-on the feedbag so that you may fuel up and shop at the same time
Do: wear the appropriate clothing
Don’t: wear any type of animal masks
Do: shop in teams, divide and conquer is a great plan
Don’t: drag your children out with you so that they may shop for their own gifts
Do: be polite to fellow shoppers
Don’t: start a wrapping paper sword fight
Do: bring the applicable store coupons to save even more $
Don’t: bring last week’s comic page because you want to show the store clerk the latest Family Circus cartoon (hint: that cartoon sucks and was never funny)
Do: use your smart phone to track deals and inventory throughout the day
Don’t: use your smart phone as a weapon so that lady with the red hat drops the last $99 laptop computer at Walmart
Do: consider sleeping in and shopping online
Don’t: forget the true meaning of the holidays, that it’s all about that bass